Noted...

Matthew pushed his sister again the other night and how else to explain that kind of behavior isn't acceptable than with a hypothetical?

After which Matthew very seriously looked at me and said (and I quote) "that would never happen." 

(I know dear.  It's a hypothetical and  I'm aware that your classmate probably wouldn't just take your pencil, but let's just say she did...would you push her?)

This coming from the one who also woke up the other morning, opened the garage door (to which the outside garage doors were both open) and exclaimed "doesn't the garage look just beautiful this mornin'"?

In his defense the sun was streaming in and the kids had helped Jim wash the cars the day before so they were nice and shiny, but it made me laugh just the same.